Why I'm mad

Unreal

2006-07-20T14:35:00.000-05:00

This is obscene. Something very scary and depressing about making little girls write notes onto bombs that are about to be fired at another country. Very weird.

From Robert Fisk

2006-07-20T14:02:00.000-05:00

Long, but worth the read

Paradise Lost: Robert Fisk's elegy for Beirut

Elegant buildings lie in ruins. The heady scent of gardenias gives wayto the acrid stench of bombed-out oil installations. And every where terrified people are scrambling to get out of a city that seems tragically doomed to chaos and destruction. As Beirut - 'the Paris ofthe East' - is defiled yet again, Robert Fisk, a resident for 30 years, asks: how much more punishment can it take?

Published: 19 July 2006

In the year 551, the magnificent, wealthy city of Berytus -headquarters of the imperial East Mediterranean Roman fleet - was struck by a massive earthquake. In its aftermath, the sea withdrew several miles and the survivors - ancestors of the present-day Lebanese - walked out on the sands to loot the long-sunken merchantships revealed in front of them.

That was when a tidal wall higher than a tsunami returned to swamp the city and kill them all. So savagely was the old Beirut damaged that the Emperor Justinian sent gold from Constantinople as compensation to every family left alive.

Some cities seem forever doomed. When the Crusaders arrived at Beiruton their way to Jerusalem in the 11th century, they slaughtered every man, woman and child in the city. In the First World War, Ottoman Beirut suffered a terrible famine; the Turkish army had commandeered all the grain and the Allied powers blockaded the coast. I still havesome ancient postcards I bought here 30 years ago of stick-like children standing in an orphanage, naked and abandoned.

An American woman living in Beirut in 1916 described how she "passed women and children lying by the roadside with closed eyes and ghastly, pale faces. It was a common thing to find people searching the garbage heaps for orange peel, old bones or other refuse, and eating themgreedily when found. Everywhere women could be seen seeking eatable weeds among the grass along the roads..."

How does this happen to Beirut? For 30 years, I've watched this place die and then rise from the grave and then die again, its apartment blocks pitted with so many bullets they looked like Irish lace, its people massacring each other.

I lived here through 15 years of civil war that took 150,000 lives, and two Israeli invasions and years of Israeli bombardments that costthe lives of a further 20,000 of its people. I have seen them armless, legless, headless, knifed, bombed and splashed across the walls of houses. Yet they are a fine, educated, moral people whose generosity amazes every foreigner, whose gentleness puts any Westerner to shame, and whose suffering we almost always ignore.

They look like us, the people of Beirut. They have light-coloured skin and speak beautiful English and French. They travel the world. Their women are gorgeous and their food exquisite. But what are we saying of their fate today as the Israelis - in some of their cruellest attacks on this city and the surrounding countryside - tear them from their homes, bomb them on river bridges, cut them off from food and water and electricity? We say that they started this latest war, and we compare their appalling casualties - 240 in all of Lebanon by last night - with Israel's 24 dead, as if the figures are the same.

And then, most disgraceful of all, we leave the Lebanese to their fate like a diseased people and spend our time evacuating our precious foreigners while tut-tutting about Israel's "disproportionate" response to the capture of its soldiers by Hizbollah.

I walked through the deserted city centre of Beirut yesterday and it reminded more than ever of a film lot, a place of dreams too beautiful to last, a phoenix from the ashes of civil war whose plumage was so brightly coloured that it blinded its own people. This part of the city - once a Dresden of ruins - was rebuilt by Rafiq Hariri, the prime minister who was murdered scarcely a mile away on 14 February last year.

The wreckage of that bomb blast, an awful precursor to the present war in which his inheritance is being vandalised by the Israelis, still stands beside the Mediterranean, waiting for the last UN investigator to look for clues to the assassination - an investigator who has long ago abandoned this besieged city for the safety of Cyprus.

At the empty Etoile restaurant - best snails and cappuccino in Beirut, where Hariri once dined Jacques Chirac - I sat on the pavement and watched the parliamentary guard still patrolling the façade of theFrench-built emporium that houses what is left of Lebanon's democracy. So many of these streets were built by Parisians under the French mandate and they have been exquisitely restored, their mock Arabian doorways bejewelled with marble Roman columns dug from the ancient Via Maxima a few metres away.

Hariri loved this place and, taking Chirac for a beer one day, he caught sight of me sitting at a table. "Ah Robert, come over here," he roared and then turned to Chirac like a cat that was about to eat a canary. "I want to introduce you, Jacques, to the reporter who said I couldn't rebuild Beirut!"

And now it is being un-built. The Martyr Rafiq Hariri International Airport has been attacked three times by the Israelis, its glistening halls and shopping malls vibrating to the missiles that thunder into the runways and fuel depots. Hariri's wonderful transnational highway viaduct has been broken by Israeli bombers. Most of his motorway bridges have been destroyed. The Roman-style lighthouse has been smashed by a missile from an Apache helicopter. Only this small jewel of a restaurant in the centre of Beirut has been spared. So far.

It is the slums of Haret Hreik and Ghobeiri and Shiyah that have been levelled and "rubble-ised" and pounded to dust, sending a quarter of a million Shia Muslims to seek sanctuary in schools and abandoned parks across the city. Here, indeed, was the headquarters of Hizbollah, another of those "centres of world terror" which the West keeps discovering in Muslim lands. Here lived Sayed Hassan Nasrallah, theParty of God's leader, a ruthless, caustic, calculating man; and Sayad Mohamed Fadlallah, among the wisest and most eloquent of clerics; and many of Hizbollah's top military planners - including, no doubt, the men who planned over many months the capture of the two Israeli soldiers last Wednesday.

But did the tens of thousands of poor who live here deserve this act of mass punishment? For a country that boasts of its pin-point accuracy - a doubtful notion in any case, but that's not the issue - what does this act of destruction tell us about Israel? Or about ourselves?

In a modern building in an undamaged part of Beirut, I come, quite by chance, across a well known and prominent Hizbollah figure, open-neck white shirt, dark suit, clean shoes. "We will go on if we have to for days or weeks or months or..." And he counts these awful statistics off on the fingers of his left hand. "Believe me, we have bigger surprises still to come for the Israelis - much bigger, you will see. Then we will get our prisoners and it will take just a few small concessions."

I walk outside, feeling as if I have been beaten over the head. Over the wall opposite there is purple bougainvillaea and white jasmine anda swamp of gardenias. The Lebanese love flowers, their colour and scent, and Beirut is draped in trees and bushes that smell like paradise.

As for the huddled masses from the powder of the bombed-out southern slums of Haret Hreik, I found hundreds of them yesterday, sitting under trees and lying on the parched grass beside an ancient fountain donated to the city of Beirut by the Ottoman Sultan Abdul-Hamid. How empires fall.

Far away, across the Mediterranean, two American helicopters from theUSS Iwo Jima could be seen, heading through the mist and smoke towards the US embassy bunker complex at Awkar to evacuate more citizens ofthe American Empire. There was not a word from that same empire to help the people lying in the park, to offer them food or medical aid.

And across them all has spread a dark grey smoke that works its way through the entire city, the fires of oil terminals and burningbuildings turning into a cocktail of sulphurous air that moves below our doors and through our windows. I smell it when I wake in the morning. Half the people of Beirut are coughing in this filth, breathing their own destruction as they contemplate their dead.

The anger that any human soul should feel at such suffering and loss was expressed so well by Lebanon's greatest poet, the mystic Khalil Gibran, when he wrote of the half million Lebanese who died in the1916 famine, most of them residents of Beirut:

My people died of hunger, and he who

Did not perish from starvation was

Butchered with the sword;

They perished from hunger

In a land rich with milk and honey.

They died because the vipers and

Sons of vipers spat out poison into

The space where the Holy Cedars and

The roses and the jasmine breathe

Their fragrance.

And the sword continues to cut its way through Beirut. When part of anaircraft - perhaps the wing-tip of an F-16 hit by a missile, althoughthe Israelis deny this - came streaking out of the sky over the eastern suburbs at the weekend, I raced to the scene to find a partly decapitated driver in his car and three Lebanese soldiers from the army's logistics unit. These are the tough, brave non-combat soldiers of Kfar Chim, who have been mending power and water lines these past six days to keep Beirut alive.

I knew one of them. "Hello Robert, be quick because I think the Israelis will bomb again but we'll show you everything we can." And they took me through the fires to show me what they could of the wreckage, standing around me to protect me.

And a few hours later, the Israelis did come back, as the men of the small logistics unit were going to bed, and they bombed the barracks and killed 10 soldiers, including those three kind men who looked after me amid the fires of Kfar Chim.

And why? Be sure - the Israelis know what they are hitting. That's whythey killed nine soldiers near Tripoli when they bombed the military radio antennas. But a logistics unit? Men whose sole job was to mend electricity lines? And then it dawns on me. Beirut is to die. It is to be starved of electricity now that the power station in Jiyeh is on fire. No one is to be allowed to keep Beirut alive. So those poor men had to be liquidated.

Beirutis are tough people and are not easily moved. But at the end of last week, many of them were overcome by a photograph in their daily papers of a small girl, discarded like a broken flower in a field near Ter Harfa, her feet curled up, her hand resting on her torn blue pyjamas, her eyes - beneath long, soft hair - closed, turned away from the camera. She had been another "terrorist" target of Israel and several people, myself among them, saw a frightening similarity between this picture and the photograph of a Polish girl lying dead in a field beside her weeping sister in 1939.

I go home and flick through my files, old pictures of the Israeli invasion of 1982. There are more photographs of dead children, of broken bridges. "Israelis Threaten to Storm Beirut", says one headline. "Israelis Retaliate". "Lebanon At War". "Beirut Under Siege". "Massacre at Sabra and Chatila".

Yes, how easily we forget these earlier slaughters. Up to 1,700Palestinians were butchered at Sabra and Chatila by Israel's proxy Christian militia allies in September of 1982 while Israeli troops - as they later testified to Israel's own court of inquiry - watched the killings. I was there. I stopped counting the corpses when I reached 100. Many of the women had been raped before being knifed or shot.

Yet when I was fleeing the bombing of Ghobeiri with my driver Abed last week, we swept right past the entrance of the camp, the very spot where I saw the first murdered Palestinians. And we did not think of them. We did not remember them. They were dead in Beirut and we were trying to stay alive in Beirut, as I have been trying to stay alive here for 30 years.

I am back on the sea coast when my mobile phone rings. It is an Israeli woman calling me from the United States, the author of a fine novel about the Palestinians. "Robert, please take care," she says. "I am so, so sorry about what is being done to the Lebanese. It is unforgivable. I pray for the Lebanese people, and the Palestinians, and the Israelis." I thank her for her thoughtfulness and the graceful, generous way she condemned this slaughter.

Then, on my balcony - a glance to check the location of the Israeli gunboat far out in the sea-smog - I find older clippings. This is from an English paper in 1840, when Beirut was a great Ottoman city."Beyrouth" was the dateline. "Anarchy is now the order of the day, our properties and personal safety are endangered, no satisfaction can be obtained, and crimes are committed with impunity. Several Europeans have quitted their houses and suspended their affairs, in order to find protection in more peaceable countries."

On my dining-room wall, I remember, there is a hand-painted lithograph of French troops arriving in Beirut in 1842 to protect the Christian Maronites from the Druze. They are camping in the Jardin des Pins, which will later become the site of the French embassy where, only a few hours ago, I saw French men and women registering for their evacuation. And outside the window, I hear again the whisper of Israeli jets, hidden behind the smoke that now drifts 20 miles out to sea.

Fairouz, the most popular of Lebanese singers, was to have performed at this year's Baalbek festival, cancelled now like all Lebanon's festivals of music, dance, theatre and painting. One of her most popular songs is dedicated to her native city:

To Beirut - peace to Beirut with all my heart

And kisses - to the sea and clouds,

To the rock of a city that looks like an old sailor's face.

From the soul of her people she makes wine,

From their sweat, she makes bread and jasmine.

So how did it come to taste of smoke and fire?

To anonymous

2006-07-20T11:56:00.000-05:00

Let's see what the US reaction is to this...how much do you want to bet it's not the same as what Israel is doing to the Lebanese?

Updates

2006-07-18T12:14:00.000-05:00

Well, things haven't really changed. My coworkers in Lebanon have been successfully evacuated as of yesterday. Still waiting on news of the US intern in Egypt who decided to spend a couple of days visiting Beirut while on his summer break. Found his blog here, so he can give you an update of his situation.

I also came across this blog. Interesting stuff. Kind of a view into the mindset of the Lebanese people's views on this matter. I know it's just a small subset, but I honestly think it's representative of the popular mood going on in Lebanon right now. It's funny, but the camps have been split into two very distinct views on this. You have people on the one side who know literally nothing about the whole situation other than some people from Lebanon snuck across the border and captured an Israeli soldier, and you have people who recognize that it's a militant subgroup that in no way represents the majority of Lebanese popular opinion.

I actually had a friend, someone who's generally pretty smart, say to me that "it's their own damn fault. That's what happens when you're a terrorist state." It's funny, everyone's suddenly an expert based on what they see on Fox News.

Fact of the matter is: I have no problem with Israel going after Hezballah. I have no problem with them fighting Hezballah, and I have no problem with them trying to find their missing soldiers. What I do have a problem with, a big problem, is the concept of collective punishment. This morning Israel attacked and killed 11 Lebanese army personnel in their barracks. They've destroyed the airport and are almost exclusively going after the infrastructure. The majority pay for the crimes of the few. How many members of Hezballah have been killed? How many civilians? To hold the Lebanese government responsible is a joke and to hold the Lebanese people responsible will do nothing more than exacerbate the situation in the future.

You know, it's sad, but I remember when the Cedar revolution was taking place, on of Syria's defenses for remaining in Lebanon was that if they left then Israel would immediately come back. Or, that the civil war would start back up.

Most Lebanese saw this for what it was; bullshit. We called Syria's bluff and started up again.

So, for the next 15 months Syria did what it could to attack Lebanese political and opposition figures in the hopes of rekindling those old conflicts. They went after Tuani, they went after countless others in the hopes of starting the fighting anew. When that didn't work, when they saw that the Lebanese people had a deep commitment to prevent new bloodshed, they instructed their proxy army to invite Israel back into Lebanon.

There can be no doubt what Israel's reaction was going to have been, in fact, it was what they counted on. What they needed. Inexperienced national leaders with no military background do not have the capability, nor the political will, to stand up to their militaries and say "do x and y, but not z".

Syria is now proved right in the minds of the Islamist supporters who believed that the Syria - Hezballah alliance was what was keeping Israel out. What "defeated" Israel in 2000.

Lebanon

2006-07-14T10:24:00.000-05:00

Well, I've haven't blogged for a while. Combination of work, not enough time, lack of anything to really blog about. Not sufficiently mad about anything...and then Israel attacked Lebanon. Blood boiled a bit.

So, a couple of people have asked me what I think is going on, and here's my views. Ultimately, the bottom line is that "might makes right". Those with a disproportionate amount of power are able to create the rules and can do whatever the want.

If you live under a rock, here's a little of what happened. Basically, on Wednesday Hezballah crossed into Israel and captured two soldiers. They were able to exploit Israel's attention being on the Gaza strip and I guess they caught the Israelis off guard. As you can imagine, it's pretty embarrassing for Israel to have this happen. Extremely embarrassing. They pride themselves on being a big, bad military force in the region, and to have a group of ragged guys break in, destroy a couple of armored vehicles, kill a few troops and the capture two more it's a pretty big deal. So they retaliated.

Now, why are they retaliating so much? The answer, in my mind, is political. Ehud Olmert is the new Prime Minister having succeeded Sharon after Sharon’s stroke/coma. Olmert served in the army for only a couple of years and has made his life as a politician, having previously been the mayor of Jerusalem. As a politician, his job is to make sure that his party wins elections. Since his party is a new party (Kadima being formed after Sharon left the Likud party last year) most Israelis don’t really know where they stand in regards to things like security. When Sharon started the party he did it as the most famous military leader in Israeli history. He had also been known as somewhat of a butcher for his hard tactics back when he served. He was able to reassure people because the one thing political opponents could never do was call him weak on security. Olmert does not have that luxury. So, whereas most people think Sharon would have handled things differently and not been as destructive, Olmert has to show the Israeli people that he’s a badass. So, when something happens in Gaza he destroys Gaza. When something happens in Lebanon, he destroys Lebanon.

Also, whereas Sharon was, irrespective of whether you liked him or not (and I personally hated the guy), a strategic genius militarily, Olmert has no background in this type of thing. So, he asks his army guys what to do and, of course, their response is to blow everything up. Imagine if a US president asked the head of the Pentagon how to wage a war in another country and didn’t have the luxury of having been in the armed services before…not hard to figure out what that looks like, is it?

Background on Hezballah: Hezballah formed in 1982 as a response in the South of Lebanon to Israel’s initial incursion into Lebanon. For the next 18 years Israel had a 20 mile “buffer zone” inside Lebanon where they used to hang out. Since the civil war had effectively destroyed Lebanon’s infrastructure, Hezballah took it upon themselves to fight the Israelis. Since they were backed by Syria and Iran they were able to operate freely inside Lebanon and pretty much do as they pleased. The also did something which was brilliant. Instead of being solely an Israeli attack machine, they built schools throughout the South as well as Hospitals. This ingratiated them with the people of the South because at that time there was no way for the official government to provide any type of services. So, Hezballah became a social movement in Lebanon as well. They have since won a small group of parliamentary seats in the most recent election and are now a formal, albeit ignored and disliked part, of the Lebanese government. I know it’s fashionable to say that Israel is the only democracy in the Middle East (which is debatable, it’s more of a Democratic Theocracy if you ask me) but that’s neither here nor there. They're definitely better about minority representation than some of the others.

As for the Lebanese people’s perspective on the issue, most of us have despised Hezballah for years. They are held in the same regard as the Syrians. The only problem is, after you’ve finished a civil war that has gone on for almost 30 years, at what point does it make sense to send your armed forces to disarm one of the last militias? The Lebanese do not want to see more Lebanese killing other Lebanese. It’s a little bad for moral and there’s a very real chance that it will lead back to another civil war. So, they spend most of their time trying to marginalize Hezballah. Whenever Hezballah starts to feel as though they are being slightly forced aside, they attack Israel, causing Israel to attack Lebanon, reinforcing their support. Round and round it goes. You would think that Israel would figure out one thing, though…this method of attacks hasn’t worked in 60 years. They are no more secure because of it…so why keep doing it? Because it helps them feel strong.

It's ultimately political. It has nothing to do with leadership. It has to do with perception. Notice that military leaders of Israel: Begin, Barak, Rabin and Sharon are the ones who have tried the unimaginable. Begin signed a peace accord with Egypt. Rabin with Arafat and Jordan. Sharon pulled them out of Gaza and tried to pull out of the WB. Barak withdrew from Lebanon. These are all people who had the military background to convince the populace that they are capable of defending them. Unfortunately, Lebanon is once again being used as the political playing field of internal Israeli politics and the regional posturing of Syrian and Iranian contempt for Israel. Don't get me wrong, it's not the only reason. But Olmert got his opening to show he is willing to be a complete madman, and it can be reassuring to the Israelis to know that their leader will sometimes do these types of things in their defense. Does it make it right? No. Reminds me of Nixon during Vietnam - he wanted them to think he was capable of doing absolutely anything to score a victory.

Oooh, the big bad foreigner has my job...or does he?

2006-04-25T08:18:00.000-05:00

I go the following as an e-mail forward yesterday and there are some interesting things I would like to point out.

First, read the forward:

RE: This says it all

"Joe Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN) for 6am. While his coffeepot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG). He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA). After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA) he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA) he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY) filled it with GAS from Saudi Arabia and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB. At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day checking his Computer (Made In Malaysia), Joe decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in AMERICA.....

Keep this circulating"

Okay, now it didn't transfer properly, so I had to recreate all the coloring. It's basically true to the design of what was sent to me. Anyway, here's the problem with what's listed above. A) It's wrong and B)It's ridiculously xeno- and ethnophobic. Ooh, the big bad foreigners are taking all of the good paying American jobs.

Please. That's absurd. First of all, no they're not. You want to know what the "good paying American jobs" are? It's called being a lawyer, doctor, accountant, working in the financial sector (investment banking). Okay? Those jobs are still here, the only problem is someone likely to agree with the statement above doesn't have the mental capacity to fill any of those jobs. Secondly, unemployment is at around 4.5% nationally. You can find the rates, broken down by state, here. We, as a nation, are not that hard up for jobs right now. Thirdly, those aren't good paying jobs. Who wants to work in the manufacturing sector? I'm not dissing it, I'm just saying most people don't dream of working in a shoe factory.

Now, about the racial aspect of the e-mail. Quit picking on foreigners. We as a nation now have a problem with both foreigners working in their own countries, because jobs get outsourced there for cheap labor, and with foreigners coming to America to work, because they will work for less than an American. The bottom line is Foreigners suck. We want them to stay where they are, but not if they will actually have a job over there. Fact of the matter is, we need all money and jobs here in the US. Only after we are done with them will we permit foreigners to work and eat too.

Now, I find it funny that the author of the e-mail made a few choices. One, he deliberately chose items from foreign suppliers when there is a comparable product here in the US. Why the fuck is he buying imported French wine? This guy has no job!! Buy the cheap shit in a box or some Cali wine. Why did he buy a Malaysian computer? Dude, get a Dell. Made in the USA. So is HP-Compaq.

Why the fuck is he buying a German car? YOU HAVE NO JOB DICKIE. What are you buying a BMW, Porsche or Benz for?????!?!?!??! For crying out loud. Get a Hundai (sp?) or go to Detroit and buy a car from there. Fucking idiot.

Filled it with Gas from Saudi Arabia...oh ohh, those big bad Arabs are at it again. This is the wierdest inclusion of all. First of all, the main exporter of oil to the US is Canada. It's a fact, look it up. Secondly, even if it were Saudi Arabia, what are the options? It's not like there's much of a choice here. No matter what, the manufacturing base in America is not going to figure out a way to magically make the oil appear under our land instead of their sand. What's the use of bitching about it? Oil is a commodity that is found. The labor market chases oil. Unlike cars, t-shirts, jeans, the sectors that chase cheap labor, this is the complete opposite of what is being complained about. But, it includes Arabs which makes it easier for people to draw on their little racist demons.

What's he buying designer jeans for? Again, poor decision. No job? No designer jeans. It's that easy. Also, who's going to hire you if you're wearing jeans and tennis shoes? Idiot. Save up and buy fucking suit (cheap one), some nice shoes (cheap ones) and figure out how to make a resume.

A New electric skillet? Are you kidding me? You're out there trying to figure out what you can do for money and your buying an electric skillet? Moron. You don't deserve a job.

Anyway, here's the response I sent to the person who sent me this:

If you were willing to work 18 hours a day for 15 cents an hour, maybe some of those companies would be willing to manufacture all those items referred to in America. That being said, however, I find it hard to believe that you would want that. Also, maybe instead of blaming the countries you listed below you should blame the manufacturers. There’s a novel idea. Maybe it’s not the fault of the poor people in Indonesia, Malaysia, China, India, Mexico or Sri Lanka who will work for the peanuts. Maybe, just maybe, it’s the fault of the company that is willing to exploit cheap labor around the world. Did that ever occur to you? That those who exploit the poor are slightly more culpable than those who are exploited? Also, if the people of this country were willing to pay a multiple of 4 or 5 for each of those products then domestic based manufacturers would finally have the incentive to base those jobs here. But, so long as investors (made in America) insist on high returns, US corporations will be required to outsource to attract capital. If you have a problem with the system, maybe you should start a grass roots campaign here to “buy American” as opposed to simply sitting there and whining about poor people overseas willing to work for the low paying jobs that most people here wouldn’t take.

Also, interesting that the author mentioned Saudi Arabian oil…First of all, the main exporter of Oil to the United States is Canada. Facts suck sometimes, I know, but you should use them from time to time. Furthermore, unfortunately for us, the majority of Oil in the world is located in the Middle East. It has nothing to do with
outsourcing, jobs or the decline of the manufacturing base in America. It’s simple geography. It’s located over there. Nothing we can do or say will change the fact that it’s still underneath their sand.

Finally, there is plenty of good wine grown and manufactured in America. Why use “French” wine as an example? It’s funny that the author of this piece simply picked and chose the country of origin, ignoring the fact that there are several American companies that make wine, electronics, cars, razors, etc. This e-mail is xenophobic crap that simply permits people to blame other countries for the problems of their
own.

Bottom line is: like I said above, until American investors and consumers actually start caring about source and origin of their products, then it doesn’t really matter. The cycle continues. In the meantime; don’t eat up my inbox with this drivel.

Soze

Heeeeeee'ssssss Baaaaaaaaccccckkkkkk

2006-04-21T14:37:00.000-05:00

Well folks, I'm back. Spent a couple of weekends in Vegas. It was cool. Wish you were there, but then again, no I don't.

Today's discussion is going to be about perception. That's right, we're going to be perceiving things today.

Saw this today. Pissed me off something terrible. You know? First of all I want to say a couple of things:

1) This war sucks and is in desperate need of some kind of international attention. I don't care who, but someone needs to get his/her ass down there and stop it.

2) This discussion is going to be about the representation of the two sides in this.

So, reading the article a couple of things jump out to me.

It was sparked in 2003 as Arab militias, which the U.S. says are backed by the government of Sudan, systematically began targeting poor blacks in the region known as Darfur — killing, raping, looting and burning hundreds of villages. Hundreds of thousands are believed to have been killed, and more than 2 million have been displaced.

Those damned Arabs again!!! Every time someone tries to live a happy life in the world those damned A-rabs start doing their thing. I swear to God it's annoying.
Wait, what? Huh? Are you saying that's not what really happened? But this lady said it did. She even started her piece with a nice anecdotal story about seeing the poor, black African children. Awe, those poor kids.

I would like to point out a couple of things about what happens when people read about the tragedy in Darfur, Sudan. Primarily it is described as a conflict between the Arabs and the black Africans. This is to try and link Arabs with racist views of blacks. Now, I'm sure some do, but I can pretty much guarantee that none of them live in the Sudan. You know why? Go on, ask. Please....

Okay, here's why. Most Sudanese Africans are (drum roll please) black themselves. Yes, it's true. There are black Arabs. I swear. For those that don't know me I spent 3 months working in Qatar last year. While there I met a bunch of Sudanese who were working as scorers for us. Now, when I first met them I was surprised. I asked myself "Soze, why are the black Sudanese working in Qatar when at home they are getting slaughtered by the Arabs?" I mean, if you were getting killed by North Dakotans at your home in Maryland, would you escape ethnic cleansing by fleeing to North Dakota? No, that's assinine.

So, I asked one why he was in Qatar. Since the official language of Sudan is Arabic I found it easy to speak with him (slight problem with accents, but who cares). I asked him, politely, what brought him to Qatar. Actually, below is a pretty accurate transcription of the conversation.

Soze: "Hello, how are you doing" (flawless Arabic)
Sudanese Gentleman: "I am good my friend, how are you?"
S: "Fine, hey, what brings you to Qatar?"
SG: "Work my friend, work. There are many troubles in my homeland."
S:"Ahh yes, the Su-of the-Dan, I know it well. But why an Arab
country?"
SG:"Because I am Arab."
S:"But I thought that the war was between the Arabs and the blacks"
SG: (stares at me confusingly) "I may not understand your Arabic, it's
pretty bad, but those of us from Africa are mostly all black"
S: "Hmm, well I'm an idiot."
SG: "yes, you are"
S: "Well, Assalam alakum my brother"
SG:"Assalam alakum to you too"

Well, that was odd. But I didn't believe him. So I googled for pictures of Sudanes Arabs...guess what? They're black. They can be found here, and here.

The people of Chad living along the Darfur-Sudan border are being killed and raped, their villages looted and burned. Every survivor we talked to described Arabs on horseback, shouting racial slurs, and saying:
"You are black slaves."
"This is Arab land, not your land."
"If you stay, Arabs will come to kill you."

I don't know why, but something tells me that the inclusion of the word "black" in the first sentance is purely for our consumption. I am pretty sure that they weren't called "black" in a derogatory manner by another black. But, if you view it as an Arab, who's mental image is one of a slightly sand colored person (no pun intended) then you can play off of peoples assumptions and infer that not only are they evil, murdering, terrorists, but they're also racists too. See, they are actually the ones who are responsible for slavery all those years ago. Not the whites. Granted, Arabs have been living in Sudan since roughly around the year 1000 AD (wikipediad it), but in those 1000 years we still get ot refer to them by their ethnic heritage. Meaning my decendants in 1000 will still be refered to as Lebanese. Correct?
Something tells me that's not right.

Another thing: the inference in the first quote seems to imply that one day the Arabs up and decided to kill the rest. Well, facts have a way of disproving these little theories that people like to come up with to demagogue certain groups: For instance according to Encarta.com:

In 2003 Darfūr rebel groups mounted an armed revolt, accusing Sudan’s Arab government of neglecting the development of the region, largely populated by black African ethnic groups. Government forces and local Arab militias fought the rebels in 2003 and 2004. In the process, the Arab militias reportedly burned villages, destroyed crops, and raped and killed civilians.

Now, this is just Encarta. I decided that since the author of the article quotes the American government that maybe I should see what the government has to say. So, I went to Voice Of America. The VOA says:

Civil war broke out in Darfur in 2003. Complaining of discrimination by Arab Sudanese, African rebels attacked government facilities. Sudanese Arab Janjaweed militia supported by the Sudanese government responded by attacking members of Darfur's African Fur, Masalit, and Zaghawa tribes. A peace agreement was signed this year by representatives from the Sudanese government and the rebel Sudan People's Liberation Movement.

Now, ultimately it really doesn't matter who starts what. What matters is that people are dying every day. But doesn't an argument lose credibility when one starts embelishing and taking liberties with facts? I think it does.

Do I know you?

2006-04-03T12:31:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the delay in posting. I've been backpacking through the Andes for the past week and unable to blog. What's that? No I wasn't? Shit, you got me there...I'm just lazy. Happy now?

Today's blog is going to be shrouded in black. We're mourning here today my friends. News reports today have disclosed that Jesse Helms has vascular dementia. For those of you who don't know what that is, let me explain. See, my dad's a vascular surgeon, so by proxy I'm clinically trained to provide expert medical advice on this. Furthermore, if you remember my Claude Allen post, you should be calling me Doctor anyway. Info on vascular dementia can be found here.

Now, I usually don't pick on people when they're down, but since Jesse probably wouldn't remember it if I did, I figured why not.

My first observation is: duh! We're only now noticing? Let's see, one of the first things that become evident with dementia is loss of short term memory. Well, this guy used to call all black men "Fred". Seriously, I'm not making that up. This guy was a Senator until January 2003!!! Think about that. Thought about it? Good. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? First of all, where did Fred come from? Was that the name of the only black man he ever spoke to?

This is, in all honesty, one of the most racist members of the United States Senate, and we're to suddenly feel sorry for him? I'm telling you right now, when the GOP starts coming out and paying "respect" to this man, I'm seriously going to throw up. I mean, even Strom Thurmond rejected his past and spent the final 30 years of his senate career repentant of being a bigot. I'll take that. Jesse Helms? Not so much. Here's an article from the Washington Post from August 2001:

In 1990, locked in a tight race with an African American Democrat, former Charlotte mayor Harvey Gantt, Helms aired a final-week TV ad that showed a pair of white hands crumpling a rejection letter, while an announcer said, "You needed that job and you were the best qualified. But they had to give it to a minority because of a racial quota." Once again, he pulled through.
This guy made a career out of being a frigging asshole. It's depressing. I for one refuse to feel bad for him. He was unrepentant, and now so am I. In fact:

FYOTW:

This weeks FYOTW goes to Jesse "How bout that Klan" Helms. Jesse Helms, former Senator from North Carolina is hereby awarded the FYOTW for his tireless efforts to reign in Civil Rights and Civil Liberties for the past 30 years. As a member of the senate he was one of the proud few to attempt a fillibuster of Martin Luther King day. Fortunately, most of the Senate, including Strom Thurmond, voted him down.
Anything else? Well, in fact there is. I've been reading idowhatiwant's linked people and I found this site. This is a former aid of Jesse's that was nominated for the 4th Circuit court. Now, I don't know what the hell is done on the circuit, but I know I don't want that guy there. So, when his nomination wasn't re-newed by Clinton, Jesse held up the nominations of ALL judges from his state. Nice one there, Jesse. Fucking Dick.

Another aide of Jesse Helms? Well none other than Claude "Why can't I steal?" Allen. That's right folks. Of course, maybe I should call him Fred Allen, seeing as how that's what Jesse probably called him. A question for Claude: What's it like to swallow so much of your pride that you would be willing to permit someone, your boss no less, to BLATANTLY degrade you in front of everyone by calling you a name he likes to call all black people? Was that the source of the self-loathing that caused you to steal? Did you tell yourself that at least he did it to everyone, so you didn't take it seriously?

Seriously, go fuck yourself Jesse.

At a loss

2006-03-28T17:14:00.000-05:00

I've seen a lot in my short time. I've been fortunate to travel, see things that most people haven't had the opportunity to see. It's usually been good. But sometimes, you have to take the bad with the good - because in all my life I have never seen something like this.

It's a statue of Britanny Spears giving birth. It's just wierd. The link isn't pronographic or anything, so don't worry about that...but it's...I don't really know how to describe it.

The artist is trying to make a statement about abortion in this too. What his statement is, I have no idea. Nor do I really care. I'm having trouble getting past the sculpture.

It's odd.

and disturbing

I have to go now.

Rachel Corrie and the inability to speak...

2006-03-24T16:24:00.000-05:00

Was reading the Speculator today. He had a fantastic piece on the Rachel Corrie play being canceled in New York. It's a facinating piece and Patrick, as always, makes some poignant remarks concerning the issue of art vis-a-vis its place in commenting on hot button, politically divisive issues.

Where do I stand on the issue? I think it's pretty clear. The fact of the matter is that there is a slight difference between the Corrie play and the Mohamed cartoons. I don't really see this as an issue of self-censorship, I see this as an issue of refusing, still, to have any rational debate in this country concerning what is happening in the West Bank and the Gaza strip. These are very emmotional issues, prone to rampant hyperbole, bigoted statements, absolute positions and little, if any, discourse. Particularly in the United States. In fact, most especially in the United States.

Most Israeli's came to a realization many, many years ago. They were going to have to eventually interact and live side by side with the Palestinians. In turn, most Palestinians have come to that very same conclusion. So what gives? Why is there no real debate on the topic in the United States, the most powerfull force in the Middle East peace process?

It's a good question, and is one that is symbolized by the following letter: A I P A C. AIPAC. Harvard University's Kennedy School of Government just released the following study. It's long, but definitely worth reading if anyone wants to thoroughly disect the interplay between discourse concerning Israel in the United States and AIPAC. It stands to note that they take great pains to point out that this is not some "Protocal of Zion" type piece, but is an actual discussion concerning lobby, in a manner similar to how one would discuss the power wielded by the NRA, AARP, etc. This is not to say that the use of a powerful lobby is wrong, it really isn't. In fact, most any special interest group wishes it played the game in much the same manner. But the question becomes, what is the end result of this alliance? Furthermore, what happens to debate when one is immediately accused of being an anti-Semite as soon as he mentions the existance of an Israeli lobby.

As is mentioned in the Harvard report:

No discussion of how the Lobby operates would be complete without examining one of its most powerful weapons: the charge of antiSemitism. Anyone who criticizes Israeli actions or says that pro-Israel groups have significant influence over U.S. Middle East policy-an influence that AIPAC celebrates—stands a good chance of getting labeled an anti-Semite. In fact, anyone who says that there is an Israel Lobby runs the risk of being charged with anti-Semitism, even though the Israeli media themselves refer to America’s "Jewish Lobby." In effect, the Lobby boasts of its own power and then attacks anyone who calls attention to it. This tactic is very effective, because anti-Semitism is loathsome and no responsible person wants to be accused of it.

Or as Cornel West puts it in Democracy Matters:

"those in the powerful Jewish lobby - though far from monolithic and certainly not an almighty cabal of Zionists who rule the United States or the world (in the vicious language of Zealous anti-Semites)- are far to the right of most American Jews and are often contemptuous of prophetic Jewish voices. In fact their preoccupation with with Israel's security at the expense of the Palestinian cry for justice has not only produced little security for Israel but also led many misinformed Jews down an imperial path that suffocates their own prophetic heritage.

Now, many of you know that I am a Westian, so when the Good Lord speaks to me about this stuff, well I listen. I find it interesting that people like Cornel West (one of the co-heads of Tikkun - along with Rabbi Michael Lerner and Susannah Heschel) felt the need to qualify his statements about the mere existance of the lobby by stating outright that he does not view it as this overarching "cabal". In fact, Professors John Mearsheimer of the University of Chicago, and Professor Stephen Walt of Harvard both state the same thing in their Kennedy School piece by stating:

The Lobby’s activities are not the sort of conspiracy depicted in anti-Semitic tracts like the Protocols of the Elders of Zion. For the most part, the individuals and groups that comprise the Lobby are doing what other special interest groups do, just much better. Moreover, pro-Arab interest groups are weak to non-existent, which makes the Lobby’s task even easier.

This is clearly to attempt to head off the inevitable. Which is, the charges of anti-Semitism that will come crashing down upon them for having the balls to question an Isreali policy.

It's akin to every American anti-war activist having to qualify each and every statement concerning the war by starting off with "I support the Troops and don't want any more to die, but" and then stating their rationale for why the Bush administration lied and forced us into the war. It's a joke.

Anyway, I think I strayed mildly off topic there...what were talking about? March Madness? Anyway, let me know what you think...

A New Knight

2006-03-23T12:39:00.000-05:00

Found another one to put at the table. This guy's good folks. Raw, funny, smart, uncensored, unwilling to dumb down his work for the masses. I'm talking about the Sport Coat Speculator. He's good. Go visit his site. It'll make you laugh and think (often at the same times).

I sat down with Patrick Dubya and conducted this interview for my readers:

Soze: Thanks for joining us Mr. Dubya.

Sport Coat Speculator: Pleasure is all mine Soze. May I add that I love what you've been doing over at "Why I'm Mad"?

S: Well, thank you for noticing. I think we've been doing some great things too.

SCS: I agree, and that's not just speculation.
(laughter)
S: Oh man, that was a good one. Anyway, can you address reports that you're related to the President George Dubya?

SCS: Well, Soze, I believe that's just speculation.
(laughter)
S: Nice. So, what have you been up to lately?

SCS: Speculating.

S: I see. Anything else?

SCS: Nope. Just a whole bunch of speculation.

S: Ah-huh, about anything in particular?

SCS: Well, I think you'll just have to check out the blog to see, now won't you?

S: A good point. A quick question about your writings: Where do you come up with some of this stuff? It's witty, funny, interesting and I often times find myself agreeing with what you're saying.

SCS: Well, that's because you're smart, Soze. And may I say that your antenna seems to be acutely aware of the issues of race, not only in the US but around the world as well?

S: Yes, you may.

SCS: Your antenna seems to be acutely aware of the issues of race, not only in the US but around the world as well.
(laughter)
S: Another good one Mr. Dubya. Another good one.

And to you, dear reader, please go out and populate the pages of the speculator...you won't be disappointed. Stake my blogging reputation on it.

Thank you for reading. Good night and Good luck.
(err, wait..nevermind)

Yeah, umm

2006-03-22T15:10:00.000-05:00

I don't think that people understood that the last post I made was a joke and that none of it actually took place. I didn't really put up an actual e-mail from my girlfriend, just like anonymous' name really isn't anonymous.

The idowhatiwant part is true, however.

FYOTW

2006-03-21T22:13:00.000-05:00

Well folks, we had a tie this week. We've got two talking heads who deserve a Fuck You Of The Week. If you thought Cancer and Fred Phelps were bad, well then hold on to your hats cuz these two are real fuckers in my book.

Regular readers to the Mad Man's Digest (nice name huh) will see that there are two distinct members of the Mad Men (my readers) who routinely write in with there thoughts on my posts. These two people are "idowhatiwant" and "anonymous". Many of you don't know them, you're lucky. These two scourges are not only members of my little universe in cyberspace, but I actually know them in real life. So, for those of you fortunate enough not to have to deal with them, please allow me to introduce them to you.

idowhatiwant. Now there's a clown if ever there was one. Raised in the once great city of Baltimore, Maryland - effectionatly referred to as Bawlmer - idowhatiwant has spent a great deal of his life "doinwhatiwant, bitch". He can usually be found harrassing members of the Syracuse University contigent of Washington, DC, asking them for what it feels like to have sports teams that actually win without having to go out and break every NCAA rule governing the interactions between athletes and boosters. Presently in law school he has "discovered" a new medium called "blogging". I have provided a picture of idowhatiwant. It's located here. He's the one on the right of the screen. As you can see, he loves the cock.

Andrew Michael Anonymous hails from the capitol of the fair state of Maryland. No, not Baltimore you ignorant ass, he's from Annapolis. For those of you who don't know, Annapolis is the home of the US Naval Academy as well as the setting of the new movie, aptly named, Annapolis. I'm sure many of you thought that Anonymous was writing in under that moniker to hide his identity, unfortunately it's his real name. After graduating from a liberal community college in Rhode Island anonymous currently spends his time pursuing a budding career as a slum lord. "It's my only real passion" he frequently says, "those poor bastards are the only thing that keeps me from having to work hard". An honorable man he can frequently be found threatening "some poor schlub" into "paying me my God damn money before I throw you and your whole family onto the streets". A man not to be trifled with, he occasionally hosts high stakes poker games at his downtown mansion. "I figured look, 30,000 square feet is just about right for me now that I'm out of college, you know?" Yes anonymous, I do know. I happen to agree. If the tenant didn't want to pay your 83% rent increases annually they shouldn't have moved in and signed a 10 year lease. Who cares how small the fine print was, and whether or not the lease flowed back and forth between English, Turkish, Russian, Greek and Hebrew? You go their signature on the document and that's all that matters.

Anyway, after some considerable thought, I have decided that maybe these two are actually worse than Fred Phelps and Cancer. Stands to reason, correct? Anyway, please vote below and we'll see who the real fucker is.

Ummm, Bullshit?

2006-03-21T12:37:00.000-05:00

Take Me To the Movies...

2006-03-16T13:29:00.000-05:00

I'm a huge movie buff. I haven't mentioned it before, but I have a quasi-photgraphic memory when it comes to movies. I love them. I am particularly fond of international films. I recently heard about a new movie from Muslimsgohomeland. For those of you who aren't geography buffs or cartographers, Muslimsgohomeland is located in between Belgium and Germany, bordering the North Sea.

Anyway, Muslimsgohomeland just sponsored a new movie, it's pretty good as far as I can tell. It mentions homosexuality, so it's going to be nominated for at least 3 Academy Awards, which is nice.

For would-be immigrants to the Netherlands, this film is a test of their readiness to participate in the liberal Dutch culture.

Awe, isn't that nice? Such sweet people, they're going to make sure you're ready first. Obviously this is the "assimibility test" that was alluded to in my most recent post on Muslimsgohomeland.

See here's the thing: The test kind of implies that it will ferret out those who would be offended to the "liberalism" found there. Which is nice, I guess. But this seems to be extraordinarily racist. I'm not sure why, it just seems like they targeting a certain group while letting white people be free....again, I can't explain why...oh, wait. I figured it out:

EU nationals, asylum-seekers and skilled workers who earn more than $54,000 per year will not be required to take the 30-minute computerized exam.
Also, citizens of the United States, Australia, New Zealand, Canada, Japan and Switzerland are exempt.

So, there we have it. If you're white or Japanese (?) don't worry about it. We don't care about your views on homosexuality or really anything. If you want to come here, come on over. But, if you're not white...well then look, you'd better be willing to accept any and everything about us lest we send you back to that God-Awful shithole you somehow dug your dirty, Arab body out of.

They also seem to be picking on the poor. You have to pay $420 freaking dollars to take this test!!! What the hell is that? Is there an exemption for people who are poor, or does Muslimsgohomeland not care about them? Fuck the poor. That's the cost of the test. If you want to prepare for the test you have to buy the "preparation" package. What's included you ask? Well, it's the video, a CD-Rom and a book on famous people from Muslimsgohomeland. That's an extra $75. So, somehow you need to scrounge up $495 just to have the honor of being personally insulted, quite intentionally I might add, so that they can review your test score and tell you "well, sorry. I don't think it's going to work out".

And what the fuck are the Japanese doing in there? Did they sit around, look at the exemptions list and say:

"Hmm, EU, Canada, Switzerland, USA, Australia and New Zealand. Is that too obvious? OH! I got it, put Japan on there. They're liberal and rich. Just the other day I was on Rich Horny Asians.com and saw lots of Japanese girls on there. It was a good one."

Something tells me that that's pretty close to what happened.
Anyway, if Muslimsgohomeland had a Statue of Liberty, I wonder what her poem would look like:

Much like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name
Mother of Exits From her beacon-hand
Glows world-wide scorn; her mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
"Keep, other lands away from me!" cries she
With silent lips. "Give me your happy, your wealthy,
Your select elite yearning to breathe free,
As for the wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Keep these, the homeless, tempest-tost from me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

Rarely am I ever rendered speechless...

2006-03-15T23:11:00.000-05:00

but this is amazing.

That's about right...

2006-03-15T23:00:00.000-05:00

Knights of the Roundtable

2006-03-15T16:45:00.000-05:00

As many of you can tell I have decided to link you to, in my mind, some of the best blogging work currently located on the internet. To the right of the message you are currently reading you will find the "Knights of the Roundtable". These represent my trusted sources of information and can be pretty funny.

The Lazy Asian - I have only recently discovered The Lazy Asian, but I must say: HUGE FAN of his work. As a lover of Asians myself, lived with one for a couple of years, I feel that he represents some of the most intelligent and humurous commentary currently located on the internet. Go visit his site and provide him with an increased non-Asian readership.

Tomorrow and Probably - Written by idowhatiwant, Tomorrow and Probably provides you with an interesting look into the mind of a soon to be attorney. If you have an interest in maybe one day going to law school, please, go visit this site and see if you have what it takes to become longwinded and pedantic. If you cannot take the heat, however, get your ass out of the courtroom.

Blue Basillica - Blue Basillica was once one of the funniest blogs I had ever read. He came out shooting, my friends, however for the past several weeks he has been mailing his posts in. I don't know what happened to him, but if he does not step it up he may lose his spot at the table. You're on notice Basillica...write or suffer the consequences.

Lies, damn lies

2006-03-15T14:39:00.000-05:00

Seriously, I love Carla J. Martin. She has brought me an immense amount of joy the past couple of days. I've always wondered if the "dumbest person alive" ever existed, and now she has shown herself to me. What's more, she's currently working in the same city I work in. I wonder if after she goes to jail I could go visit her, just to tell her how big a fan I am of stupidity.

For those of you who aren't paying attention, Carla J. Martin is an attorney with the TSA. She's on the Zacarias Moussaoui trial. See, Zeke is a terrorist. He's the only person ever tried in the US for the crimes of 9-11. He was going to get the death penalty, but Carla made sure he didn't get it. "How?" you ask? Well, Carla is a liar. She's also a cheat (and not a very good lawyer from what I can surmise). Carla broke pretty much every rule the judge had in place regarding the treatment of witnesses.

Let me just tell you what the judge had to say about this calling Martin's actions ""the most egregious violation of the court's rules on witnesses in all the years I've been on the bench."

Harsh words from the judge. But, realistically, Judge Brinkema has only been on the Federal bench since 1993. How much could she really have seen in that time? Wait a minute...apparently she's also a history buff: "In the annals of criminal law, I don't know if there has ever been a case with this many significant problems."

Damn dude, that's kind of harsh, no? I wonder if this is going to have ramifications on other cases she's worked on. I mean, can't someone who's lost a case before her simply ask for a retrial stating that obviously she's a cheat? I know, they'd need proof of witness tampering first, but I think every lawyer who's ever faced her is currently speaking to the entire witness list right now, no?

This begs the question: why did she do it? And what is she going to tell the court when she inevitably gets brought up on some form of charges. Is she going to say that she didn't know she couldn't tamper with the witnesses? Well, let's ask her mom:

Ms. Martin's mother, Jean Martin Lay, said she spoke to her daughter Monday night.

"She was so devastated," Ms. Lay said in a telephone interview from her home in Knoxville, Tenn. "She said she just didn't hear the judge."

Ms. Lay said her daughter was in the courtroom when Judge Brinkema issued the order on handling witnesses, but was probably concentrating on something else "instead of being mindful."

Mom's are cool, aren't they? I know my mom would probably mention that I was had a natural propensity for day dreaming if I were ever in the same situation.
It would go like this:

"Oh, well Soze is very bright. I love him very much, but sometimes he just stares out of windows and doesn't really pay attention. Also, was this 'law thing' part of his homework? Because he never really liked doing the homework he was assigned, and that could explain it all."

Awe, thanks mommy.

But is Carla really that bad? Well, here's something else from our friends at the NY Times:

According to court records, she led an effort on behalf of the government to try to intervene in a defamation, discrimination and malicious prosecution lawsuit brought against Lufthansa by one of Mr. Pishevar's clients. The client was Kamyar Kalantar-Zadeh, an Iranian-born doctor, now an American citizen and associate professor of medicine at U.C.L.A. who was arrested and spent a night in jail after complaining about discriminatory treatment by Lufthansa officials at Dulles International Airport.

Lufthansa tried to have the case dismissed by filing a secret motion that said it had detained Mr. Kalantar to follow a secret F.A.A. security directive. According to court records, Ms. Martin urged Lufthansa to withhold the summary judgment motion and the security directive from both Mr. Kalantar and his lawyer, Mr. Pishevar. Court records show that Ms. Martin said to one Lufthansa lawyer that ordinarily much of the evidence would be available to lawyers for a plaintiff. But she said the government sought to keep all the material from Mr. Pishevar, an American citizen and member of the bar in Washington, Maryland and the United States Supreme Court, because he had worked for an organization that fights discrimination in the United States against Iranians.
Judge Henry H. Kennedy Jr. of the Federal District Court in Washington ultimately denied the effort to dismiss the case and directed the government to turn over the material, which remains under seal, Mr. Pishevar said. The case has not yet been set for trial. Mr. Pishevar said he still felt numb from his experience with Ms. Martin, who he said was "from behind the scenes, trying to pull many of the strings."
Told about the latest developments in the Moussaoui case, Mr. Pishevar paused, then said, "Res ipsa loquitur," a Latin legal term meaning, "The thing speaks for itself."

OHHHHHHHHHHHHH. HE BUSTED OUT SOME LATIN ON HER ASS!!!!!!!!!

So, back to the "why". I believe she's going to come out and declare that she's recently converted to Islam and wanted to ensure that Al-Qaeda wins. Either that or she's going to come out and be really against the death penalty. To the point of being willing to go to jail for it.

I happen to be...

2006-03-13T22:25:00.000-05:00

Was on the subway today and I saw something very interesting. It was an average, run of the mill white anglo saxon American speaking with two gentlemen who seemed to be either of Pakistani or Afghani descent. The white gentleman was effusive in his wanting to be helpful. He was providing subway directions to the two men whose english was somewhat limited. The whole scene struck me as funny. Not for any particular reason, it just seemed that the man, heretofore referred to as Whitey McWhite, was kind of over the top in his desire to be clearly welcoming and helpful to these two immigrants, non-resident aliens, illegals who were struggling to navigate the subway system of Washington, DC.

It got me to thinking: are we as a society turning a corner in dealings with Arabs? Nah, probably not. But I was wondering Arab is the new black. Does knowing one of us now qualify as the new currency of our time? You're probably confused. So here's what I mean.

For the longest time white people sort of felt permission to deride African-Americans when there is none around. When the incredibly offensive comment is made, and someone else says, laughingly, something along the lines of "awe, that's bad" the white person usually gets to say "Oh, come on...some of my best friends are black" or when they are in the middle of a conversation and instantly want "street cred" they will reference their friend who "happens to be black" and immediately that tells whomever they are speaking to that they are not a racist, bigot, homophobe, etc. because they "know" someone of that ilk.

Anyway, I was staring at the interaction and I started to wonder about whether or not Whitey McWhite would go home that day feeling as though he had done a good deed, not only for helping out a foreigner, but for helping out a foreigner from a land that is currently being attacked throughout the west. Does he go home and say "well, I am not one of the racists...I helped out one of them earlier today on the subway...so long as they don't try and own one of our ports I'm happy with them doing whatever it is they want to do here"? This inveriably led me to start to wonder about myself. Am I the currency that some people use to permit themselves to make quasi-racist, offensive comments about Arabs/ Muslims when I am not around, and then say "well, my friend happens to be Arab/Muslim, so that grants me some form of permission to say x, y, z."? I hope so, I think that would be cool. Really cool.

I know, you're confused again. Here's why it's cool. If people need me to be their currency in situations where I am not around, they will need to protect their ability to have their friend "who happens to be" around...and that's where I can start abusing them. I just need to find out who it is, that's all. Once I do that the sky's the limit. "Excuse me Whitey, can you please do me a favor and go buy me my beer? Cool. Go grab me a case of vodka? Dynooooomite."

So, if you ever here someone say "My friend Soze, who happens to be an Arab/Muslim" Please CALL ME and tell me. I need this information. I can be reached at 1-800-Whitey Sucks (yes, I have a toll free number-Jealous?).

Huge fan of...

2006-03-13T14:30:00.000-05:00

Saw this blog today, read it, almost died laughing.

Go visit this person's site. She is funny as fuck.

She's also going to get a seat of honor on my Blog links.

Pourquoi Claude, pourquoi?

2006-03-13T13:51:00.000-05:00

Alright everyone, sit back, relax, grab a drink...cause this is a dooozy.

This post is about Claude Allen. Claude Allen is easily one of my new favorite people. See, Claude Allen is a thief. Not just any thief, Claude Allen likes to steal from Target. His method was extraordinarily interesting. You see, Claude used to go to Target, purchase good, place them in his car, go back into Target with the bag and the receipt, find the same item on the shelf, place it in the bag and then take it to the counter for a refund. He would then have the items for free. I guess this is slightly more ingenious than simply taking the items and shoving them in his pocket, but the outcame is the same.

So, what makes this interesting you ask? Well, Claude used to be the Chief Domestic Policy Advisor for President Bush. Shocking, huh? What I don't understand is why he didn't just talk Bush into cutting taxes some more. I mean, he would have wound up with the same amount of money in his bank account and the items. Couldn't that have been a slightly more roundabout way of getting the items he needed?

Here's a quote from Allen's attorney Mallon Snyder. Counselor Snyder said he feels confident that Allen will be able to prove that the incidents were "a series of misunderstandings."

I misunderstand some things sometimes too. Like just the other day I bought a Ferrari and financed it with someone else's credit info. See, I misunderstood that when you buy a car it has to be under your name. I thought you just had to find the information of someone who could afford it. My mistake.

Anyway, I would really love to be a fly on the wall while he explains this. "You see, here's the deal: I thought that that's how the system works. You buy something, put it in your car, and then use the receipt to return to the store something you didn't buy. Sorry guys. I didn't understand."

Either this guy has the IQ of a mule, or he thinks we do. I love his resume: B.A. UNC-Chapel hill, followed by a stint on the team of Sen. Jesse Helms (wtf???). Then he decided to go to Duke for Law School. After law school he went to... WAIT A MINUTE. HOLY SHIT!! I FIGURED IT OUT.

It's so simple. You see, anyone who commits crimes this stupid do so for any number of reasons, but the primary one is that they hate themselves. You see, I'm not a psychiatrist, but I play one in real life. By coupling together degrees from UNC-Chapel Hill and Duke he instinctively hated students from the other campus. Unfortunately, however, this included himself. He was torn. He wanted to hate the others, nay he HAD to hate the others, but in doing so he hated himself. THAT'S WHY.

Dude, someone confer a Ph.D on my right now. Fuck it, you bitches can just call me doctor from now on.

My favorite part about this is that he was up for a Federal Judgeship. Woops. Talk about some bad character screening by the Bush White House.

Now I understand

2006-03-13T12:54:00.000-05:00

Alright...I figured it out. I now know why we need to have secret military tribunals, illegal detention centers and so on... It's not that we intentionally want to violate anyone civil liberties, it's just that our government officials are so patently inept that they really have no clue as to how to win a slam dunk case. It's located here if you like.

It's comical really. The guy pleads guilty, there is no realistic chance that a jury finds in his favor on anything...honestly, no way in hell. So, what happens? The fucking lawyer from the FAA actually sits down with transcript of the proceedings and SHOWS it to the potential witnesses from the FAA. Jesus Christ, what the fuck? Do we simply want to have an excuse for the tribunals? Is that what this is?

A new delicacy

2006-03-10T07:43:00.000-05:00

I haven't mentioned this before, but I'm somwhat of a food expert. I have an extraordinarily refined pallet and am frequently asked to appear in my friends kitchens to taste their culinary concoctions (alright fine, I show up at my friends houses right as their about to eat and grub food off them-geesh, you didn't have to be so rude about it).

Anyway, I saw this today and got hungry. We're making Arab foie gras! How cool is that? I wonder what it'll taste like?

I started trying to figure out why we decided to make Arab foie gras, and then I found this. Turns out we are banning the force feeding of animals for the production of foie gras in California by 2012. We obviously need another production source since we don't want to be importing things from Freedom Land (France).

Now, I know what you're thinking. You thinking, could this really be the same thing? Well, the answer is yes.

Wikipedia describes the force feeding of the animals this way:

The feed is administered using a funnel fitted with a large tube (20 to 30 cm long) which forces the feed into the animal's esophagus. If using an auger system to drive the feed, the procedure takes about 45 to 60 seconds. If using a pneumatic system, the process takes only about 2 to 3 seconds. Care is taken during the feeding process to ensure no damage to the esophagus occurs, which could cause injury or death in the animal.

So that's how the animals are treated. Here's how the other animals (Arabs) are treated:

Authorities at the camp have been accused of inserting a tube into the nose and down to the stomach of a prisoner on hunger strike and keeping him strapped in a chair for hours at a time, forcing him to defecate and urinate in his clothes.

So there you have it. At least the birds are allowed to wander around after they're fed. The prisoners have no such luck. I guess we should be kind of honored that they would choose to prepare Arabs in the same manner that one would prepare a fine delicacy, kind of like how we should be honored that Arabs were taken to an island in the Caribbean for storage (err, housing), but seeing as how only 10 of the 500 (.02%) have been formally charged with a crime, something rubs me the wrong way about this. Especially since this guys hunger strike went on for 5 months prior to his being force fed. What that tells me is that it wasn't a total hunger strike. He was still getting nutrients somehow. He had to have been, he'd be dead otherwise. So, why decide to force feed him now? Seems like just another attempt to prove to someone in prison (who is in prison without any charges being filed against him whatsoever) that he really has no rights while he is there. He does whatever you say whenever you say it.

I like how the World Medical Association is trying to get the American Medical Association to abide by the agreement they signed back in 1975 stating opposition to this type of force feeding. Don't they realized that an American's signature only means that we recognize that the agreement exists for the sole purpose of enforcement against other nations? I mean hell, we signed the Geneva Convention, didn't we? That hasn't stopped us from breaking that.

I'm Back

2006-03-09T21:32:00.000-05:00

I'm back folks. Got shut down for a couple of days by blogspot.com. Apparently I got flagged by their robot as being spam. I don't think I've ever been so insulted in my entire life. I mean, I'm no Shakespeare, Mellville, Twain or Ronzio, but to have my writing confused with Spam is slightly depressing.

Anyway, below is the give and take I had with blogspot concerning my blog:

Hello,Your blog has been reviewed, verified, and whitelisted so that it will nolonger appear as potential spam. If you sign out of Blogger and sign backin again, you should be able to post as normal. Thanks for your patience,and we apologize for any inconvenience this has caused.Sincerely,Blogger Support

To Whom it May Concern;
Thank you very much for you speedy reply. Honestly, it was infinitely faster than anticipated. Although I would have preferred a detailed response to my actual problem, I am well aware of the need to simply send out a stock answer in the hopes that people can figure out problems on their own. Unfortunately, I am not able to handle this situation without the help of some members of your fine organization.
On to my problem; I keep getting the following message when I try to create a new post:

WARNING

This blog has been locked by Blogger's spam-prevention robots. You will not be able to publish your posts, but you will be able to save them as drafts.
Save your post as a draft or click here for more about what's going on and how to get your blog unlocked.

Now, as you can tell by the fact that I am writing in to complain, I do, in fact, exist. I have submitted multiple attempts to get this handled through the link on the page, however that has yet to work. If it's at all possible, would you please take care of this? I consider this to be a very high priority, although I would understand if you all felt a little differently.

Please note that I feel that I have a lot to say and that I am hopefull that my blog and blogspot.com can work together in a manner beneficial to the two parties involved. If you have any questions please do not hesitate to contact me.

I thank you for your time and look forward to hearing from you soon.

Sincerely yours,
Soze

Hi there,
Thanks for contacting Blogger Support. Since we cannot always respondpersonally to every message we get, we encourage you to check BloggerHelp, where you can find answers to many common questions. Here are someof the top articles which could help you out:
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F.Y.O.T.W.

2006-03-07T13:20:00.000-05:00

This weeks Fuck You of The Week goes to this group right here. Worthless fucks. Here's my question. How come people who ask that our troops come HOME and not be sent overseas, mostly democrats, are called traitors, unpatriotic, unsupportive of the troops by the mostly republican members of society, and groups like this hardly ever get mentioned. I mean, is there any doubt out there that these people represent the most right wing extremist views? So, they're the Republican Right Wing representatives.

There website is absolutely disgusting. It can be found here, but it's really annoying to look at.
I've been looking into Fred Phelps, the groups leader, and he has some pretty interesting quotes attributed to him:

A good left hook makes for a right fine wife. Brethren, they can lock us up, but we'll still do what the Bible tells us to do. Either our wives are going to obey, or we're going to beat them! [22]

We don't picket to win people over, idiot. It's to harden people's hearts. Make them hate. Make them hate God even more than they already do.
Our goal is to preach the Word of God to this crooked and perverse generation. By our words, some will repent. By our words, some will be condemned. Whether they hear, or whether they forbear, they will know a prophet has been among them... our goal is to glorify God by declaring His whole counsel to everyone... we hope that by our preaching some will be saved.[3]

Anyway, for more information on this group go to Wikipedia, I've just been reading about them and am thoroughly disgusted. I did like that when Fred Phelps was disbarred in an unprecedented move the dissbarment order was signed by EVERY Federal Judge in Kansas.

Kudos goes out to the bikers. I like them.

So, Fuck You Fred Phelps.

I FOUND HIM

2006-03-07T08:07:00.000-05:00

Remember the other day when I said I wanted people who reminded me of Martin Luther King Jr? No? What do you mean no? Just scroll down dummy.

Anyway, for the past few days I've been walking around thinking about MLK. Like I said, I really do start thinking about these things on every day other than the ones I'm supposed to. I guess that would explain why I always screw up Valentines Day, Birthdays, Christmas, etc.

So I'm at the train station yesterday and I'd just finished a book called Confessions of an Economic Hit Man - a damn good book. Go buy it. Can't afford it? Go steal it. Have too much to lose to steal? Well then you can obviously afford to buy it asshole.

Anyway, I needed a new book. A good one. So I started to look around and I found Democracy Matters : Winning the Fight Against Imperialism. It's by Cornel West. You may not know him. He's a genius so you may not hang out in the same social scene, but you should go out and buy everything he's ever done. You see, I don't believe in God, but I do believe in Cornel West. He's my new Jesus. In fact, he has a lot in common with Jesus. They both have cool hair, some facial hair, they both preach tolerance and they're both black.

So, I am starting a new Religion. It's called Westianity. Now, there will be some people that try to impose their own skewed beliefs in this religion. We'll call those people "Whitey". But instead of actually calling them Whitey, we're going to call them "Summers". See Larry Summers thought that Cornel West should have been doing more research and pissed him off. That's bullshit. It's a good thing that West went to Princeton instead, although it's a shame that he left so soon before Summers' tenure was over. Fuck Larry Summers.

I'll be writing in as I read the book with choice thoughts on it, but you all should definitely go out and buy it right now.

Perrier, French Fries and Evian

2006-03-06T21:11:00.000-05:00

Ahh the French. What a great people. They never cease to amaze, do they? Anyone see this? So basically the French are saying that in "the interests of public security and protection of order" the Sikhs should remove their headscarfs. Is it me or is this not just BLATANT racism? They are targeting laws specifically against ethnic minorities. It's almost comical, if it weren't so offensive.

It's like the article from a couple of posts ago where the French figured prominantly. Funny, after I finished writing I remembered that I wanted to speak about the French part, but then I started speaking with the Anonymous copy editor that was correcting my hyperbole, and well I'm digressing.

Ditto for Schuble's counterpart in France, Nicolas Sarkozy. "The French way of integration no longer works," he said, meaning France's long-held pretense that its strict public secularism could erase differences and make newcomers "French." Thus Sarkozy unveiled a new immigration law earlier this month, a virtual copy of the Dutch regulations. Sarkozy plans to introduce highly selective immigration, testing for the "assimilability" of those it admits. A new "contract of welcome and integration" stipulates learning French and looking for a job in return for 10-year residence permits and discrimination protections. Immigrants failing to respect basic Western values face deportation.

Asses. I like the "testing for the 'assimilability'". Wonder what that's like. Could it be similar to testing a turkey to see if it's done at Thanksgiving? What about testing a developmentally disabled child to see if they're capable of going to school? You see the problem isn't whether or not someone is willing to come to France and be a productive member of society, but whether or not they will "buy" in to French beliefs. And that's crap. Your only requirement to live somewhere is whether or not you will abide by their agreed upon codes of conduct. Not whether or not you believe in those codes. Now they will be taking tests to see whether or not they will be willing to "drink the punch", so to speak. And that's not right.

I like the "contract". If you are willing to learn French, and become like us, then we will permit you to stay here for up to ten years, and only then will we be willing to provide you with discrimination protection. Does anyone not see the implied statement that should you not agree to "assimilate" completely that you will not be afforded those same protections? I know that's probably not what they meant, but in light of the other issues currently going on in Europe it's not that far of a stretch. Wouldn't you say? No, you wouldn't? Well I didn't ask You!!

Furthermore, these two articles almost directly contradict each other. The one about the Sikh implies that the reasoning behind the removal of the overt religious symbolism is to foster a secular, more harmonious populace, free from the interferences of religion. But, has anyone ever seen a Sikh without the turban on? I have, you know what they have underneath? A whole lot of hair, that's what. So if France is going to infringe on their rights by forcing them to remove the turban, they will still be clearly identifiable because they will have about 6 miles of hair on their heads. You see, Sikhs don't cut their hair, ever. Maybe someone should have done a little research on this in France first. I mean, YOU CAN STILL IDENTIFY THEM. Don't they have Wikipedia there? I found this on Wikipedia. Seriously, go read about Sikhs. They're like the friendliest, nicest, most wholesome religion out there...and that's where France decided to start their little shit fit? Now, I know what you're going to say. You're going to say "Soze, that site is in English. The French don't speak English." I know, but as you can see above I yelled some of the things in English. It's like when American's go to France and figure they can communicate by simply yelling at the French. But, I also checked the French Wikipedia site. Guess what, they have a page for Sikhs in French too!! I swear. It's here.

So then what's the point? Easy, to prove to the Sikhs, daily, that they are different. And to provide an unwelcoming environment for them. That's it. Unfortunately the Sikhs suffer from something I call "Sislam". Sislam is a disease that stands for "Similar to Islam". Now, Islam technically has more in common with Judaism and Christianity, but who wants to talk in technicalities. The Europeans in general, and the French in particular, seem to feel that since some Muslims wear a headdress and so do Sikhs, that they must be very similar religions. Granted it would take 13.355 seconds to figure out the difference, but they're a little too busy listening to Techno music and wearing tight (really tight) jeans.

Freaky.

I'm an idiot

2006-03-06T16:57:00.000-05:00

So, I tried to link you all to a very well written synopsis of my thoughts on the UAE deal...instead I linked you to a discussion on the Mohammed Cartoons. Whoops.

Here's something you will have to understand about me before continuing to read the blog: I'm an idiot. Not in the self-effacing way, no no no...sometimes I'm just dumb. This being one of those times.

So, from now on just go to this site and read. Word on the street is if you can do it for 3 years you'll get an honorary law degree. The UAE shit is on there somewhere.

Ask and you shall receive...

2006-03-06T16:14:00.000-05:00

The UAE port deal; what a wonderful phrase.
The UAE port deal; aint no passing craze

It means no Arabs, for the rest of your days.
It's your problem free, philosophy:
No-Arabs-Amitata

I have serious issues with this. Idowhatiwant's been writing about it for a while now, but since I'm not hopelessly pedantic, you may enjoy what I have to say a little too.

It's crap. It's not just crap, it's a whole bunch of crappity crap. Sometimes I seriously wonder if people in this country intentionally misunderstand things so that they can get upset. I mean look; I'm the angriest person I (and most of you too) know. But even I will sometimes sit down, take a deep breathe, smoke a cigarette, drink 4 gallons of vodka, 2 martinis, 3 beers and smoke some crystal meth to calm down, and others should as well (but not kids...kids should be cool and stay in school).

This is what I'm referring to. It's the online mail bag from Newsweek.

I'm going to speak to Cheryl from Elizabethtown, Ky. Cheryl had this to say about the deal:

Cheryl from Elizabethtown, Ky., writes that whether or not “Dubai may be a fine and wonderful ally … the government should not be outsourcing American jobs.”

Are you kidding me? Look you freaking moron: Who said anything about outsourcing of jobs? Did you read the word somewhere and decide it would be nice to throw it around? Maybe you should use a frigging dictionary and see what it means. They're selling their company, genius. To play off of Spaceballs: The Movie; "They aint outsourcing shit". See, they're selling their company- THAT'S IT. The workers will still be American's and the ports will still be located on US soil. That's an important part of being a port. It has to be located IN THE COUNTRY IT'S SERVICING!!!!! Unbelievable. Outsourcing? I can practically GUARANTEE that NO AMERICAN WILL LOSE HIS JOB FROM THIS. If one does, they will most likely be replaced by an AMERICAN. Does she even know what the debate is about?

Secondly, we have Mike from the bottom of Page 2 of the mail call. Mike decided to stop reading the article everyone else is discussing after the first paragraph and wrote this in response:

Mike, who didn't give a hometown, doesn’t share that view. “Another column on how George W. Bush is too dumb to be president,” he writes. But “the economy is roaring [and] we haven't had a terrorist attack since 9/11/01 … This is a war, everything doesn't happen exactly like it is planned. The administration may have made some mistakes, but any administration put in the same situation would have made mistakes as well.”

Okay Mikey. Thanks for pointing out that we haven't had a terrorist attack since the last terrorist attack. That's nice. Like we were Israel or something and were fighting the daily threat of terrrorist attacks under the Democrats, and then finally Bush emerged, like a Phoenix from the ashes to protect us. Fact of the matter is we've only had one, and one's enough.
And there have been tons of "terrorist attacks" since 9/11/01 Mikey. Just because non have occurred on U.S. soil, doesn't mean they don't count. Is a dead American worth any less simply because he died overseas? You should support our troops Mikey. And who said anything about a "roaring" economy? In fact, we just requested that Congress increase our debt ceiling.

Work with me here Mikey: If you were making a $100k a year, but had $400 k in debt, would you consider yourself a success (mortgages not included)? On top of that, would you voluntarily reduce your income level? Would you say to your boss "Look, you've been paying me well, and even though I have a lot of obligations I need to pay for, please reduce my salary 10%, I'll just take out another credit card to keep paying for food. Thanks."

That's assinine. But that's EXACTLY what our government is doing and half the country is happier than a pig in shit about it. Let's see: We have a ton of debt, so we are going to REDUCE our income by cutting taxes. Then, to make up for the shortfall we are going to ask Congress to increase our debt ceiling. SMART.

But I digress. If you want to read a good synopsis of the UAE deal, and one that accurately reflects my opinion on the matter, please follow this link to Idowhatiwant's page. He basically plagiarized my entire lunch conversation with him, slapped a few legal sounding words in there, polished it up with some fancy editing techniques, and presto.

Multiculturalism is Bunk

2006-03-06T11:04:00.000-05:00

Starting to get a little upset here. I know I know, what else is new.

Saw this online today and I have to say the Europeans are really a funny bunch. First of all they come blasting into the Middle East, guns blazing, and take it over for a while. Then they get upset when some of the "dirty dirties" come hang out in their back yards. I mean seriously, we are to be honored at the mere fact that the French came to Lebanon to teach us about how lowly and pathetic we are, but if a Muslim goes there...well, that's just not right. Fuckers. The funny thing is that they used to enjoy our company. We liked each other for a while, but then things started changing and they decided that it would be better if they only supported us while we were away. I mean, the Europeans are some of the Arab's staunchest supporters in Palestine and Iraq. Just the other day the Germans felt it necessary to outright deny involvement in aiding the United States in the war in Iraq.

Choice quotes:

"We demand a new social contract," says Jan Wolter Wabeke, High Court Judge in The Hague. "We no longer accept that people don't learn our language, we require that they send their daughters to school, and we demand they stop bringing in young brides from the desert and locking them up in third-floor apartments."

Damn Jan, chill out a bit. I'm sorry, but I'm extremely offended by his reference to "bringing in young brides from the desert and locking them up in third-floor apartments".

First of all, the whole Middle East isn't some vast fucking desert you ignorant, racist prick. Secondly, you're a fucking High Court Judge!! STAY THE FUCK OUT OF POLITICS!!! Quit legislating from the bench (wait, ignore that comment). What the fuck is this about? What would we do if members of our Supreme Court started commenting publicly on pending legislation that is still being debated on the floors of the House or the Senate? I mean, that would give an indication as to whether or not they would view some things as constitutional. We would then have the Supreme Court members, who are not elected, affecting the legislative process. WEAK!!!

Secondly, can I bring in a young bride from a city and lock her up in a second-floor apartment? I'm not claiming that this doesn't happen, but to somehow hold it up as the "norm" or as being symbolic of being an Arab then he can go fuck himself.

And another thing, you fucking racists, how is this legal:

the great cosmopolitan port city of Rotterdam just published a code of conduct requiring Dutch be spoken in public.

What is that, a joke? You can legislate the language people speak in public now? What type of bullshit is that? What's the punishment? What if you're a fucking tourist? Can you get in trouble for not being fluent in a language prior to visiting that country? This is so patently stupid that it makes me fucking furious. I mean shit, we're probably one of the most xenophobic countries in the world right now, and even we know better than to try some shit like that.

Here's another question about the language part: what are the odds that a Frenchman, or a Spaniard who are visiting the fine city of Rotterdam get ticketed for not speaking Dutch in public? I'd say it's roughly the same as Blue Basilica getting turked by a syphilitic bear.

I Wikipedia'd Rotterdam and came across some interesting facts:

Rotterdam is the city of the Netherlands with the highest percentage of non-western foreigners. Nearly half the population is not born or have at least one parent who is not born in the Netherlands.

Are we in the habit of just pissing off the majority of our citizenry? Unbelievable...I say everyone just goes to Amerstdam instead and get's high from now on...no more shipping to Rotterdam.

Fucking assholes.

Chucky

2006-03-03T17:39:00.000-05:00

Charles Krauthammer makes me mad. Really mad. And not just because he beats up Germans (get it? Kraut Hammer)

Did you see this in the Washington Post? I swear, he's a fucking moron, and I don't care what his bio says.

What is grotesque about this moment of plot clarity is that the overwhelmingly obvious critique of actual U.S. policy in the real Middle East today concerns America's excess of Wilsonian idealism in trying to find and promote -- against a tide of tyranny, intolerance and fanaticism -- local leaders like the Good Prince. Who in the greater Middle East is closest to the modernizing, democratizing paragon of "Syriana"? Without a doubt, President Hamid Karzai of Afghanistan, a man of exemplary -- and quite nonfictional -- personal integrity, physical courage and democratic temperament. Hundreds of brave American (and allied NATO soldiers have died protecting him and the democratic system they established to allow him to govern. On the very night the Oscars will be honoring "Syriana," American soldiers will be fighting, some perhaps dying, in defense of precisely the kind of tolerant, modernizing Muslim leader that "Syriana" shows America slaughtering

What the hell does Karzai have to do with this? "Greater Middle East", come on, just say it: MUSLIM. We're all alike, so quit parsing. Next thing we know Indonesia will be brought into the greater Middle East. Either "The Hammer" needs a geography lesson, or he should have just stuck to medicine.

In my naivete, I used to think that Hollywood had achieved its nadir with Oliver Stone's "JFK," a film that taught a generation of Americans that President John F. Kennedy was assassinated by the CIA and the FBI in collaboration with Lyndon Johnson. But at least it was for domestic consumption, an internal affair of only marginal interest to other countries. "Syriana," however, is meant for export, carrying the most vicious and pernicious mendacities about America to a receptive world.

What is he an idiot? "JFK" was only for domestic consumption? Does he really think that foreigners who saw it didn't feel that it was indicitive of the powers of the CIA? I mean the CIA has been killing foreigners for years. For a while it was the only thing it did. Do you really think that a movie like JFK was of little interest abroad? Well the answer is "no" jackass. Jesus Christ. "JFK" simply affirmed the beliefs of foreigners that the CIA could do whatever it wanted. If anything "JFK" was slightly more detrimental to the U.S.' image overseas because very few people are familiar with the truth over there (admitedly slightly less than here). But a story that takes place in thier neck of the woods I feel they would have a slightly better chance to discern the truth. You know?

Anyway, Chucky sucks. I wish he'd contract an STD from Blue Basilica.

Random Thoughts

2006-03-02T21:44:00.000-05:00

I was riding the MARC train home tonight and I started thinking about Martin Luther King. Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "Soze, why on Earth are you thinking of Martin Luther King when today isn't January 16th?" Well, that's a good question. I guess the answer is this:

I don't celebrate holidays the way everyone else does. You see, I refuse to celebrate MLK's accomplishments on his day. Instead, I'll celebrate him the other 364 days a year.

I refuse to stand in Memorial of our fallen soldiers on Memorial Day, I'll stand in Memorial for them the other 364 days of the year.

I will not celebrate labor on Labor day in September, instead I will work the other 364 days of the year.

Anyway, I was thinking of the war in Iraq and MLK jumped to mind. I remembered a great quote he had and decided that I wanted to go find it. I was tempted to call up Idowhatiwant and put him to work while I was on the train, but I figured I would leave him alone instead.

Anyway, I found the quote

Don't let anybody make you think God chose America as his divine messianic force to be a sort of policeman of the whole world. God has a way of standing before the nations with justice and it seems I can hear God saying to America "you are too arrogant, and if you don't change your ways, I will rise up and break the backbone of your power, and I will place it in the hands of a nation that doesn't even know my name. Be still and know that I'm God. Men will beat their swords into plowshafts and their spears into pruning hooks, and nations shall not rise up against nations, neither shall they study war anymore." I don't know about you, I ain't going to study war anymore.

Martin Luther King doesn't make me mad. He actually relaxes me. While looking up some stuff on him I found another fantastic quote. This one is unbelievable:

It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can keep him from lynching me, and I think that's pretty important.

How great is that? That sums everything up right there. In fact, I think there's a Martin Luther King quote for almost every situation:

Our scientific powers have outrun our spiritual powers; we have guided missiles and mis-guided men.

We had guided missiles back then? Who knew?
The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. Instead of diminishing evil, it multiplies it. Through violence you may murder the liar, but you cannot murder the lie, nor establish the truth. Through violence you may murder the hater, but you do not murder hate. In fact, violence merely increases hate. So it goes. Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that. Hate multiplies hate, violence multiplies violence, and toughness multiplies toughness in a descending spiral of destruction.... The chain reaction of evil — hate begetting hate, wars producing more wars — must be broken, or we shall be plunged into the dark abyss of annihilation.

Anyway, I'm getting upset now. Where the fuck have these people gone? Why don't we have leaders like this anymore? Huh? I want leaders like this around. He was great because he actually believed it, but I've become so jaded that all I need is the lip service these days. Just say these things. I don't care if you don't mean it, all we need is people who can at least talk the talk right now...maybe they will inspire some people to walk the walk. I don't know, maybe it was a simpler time back then, but I can't see how.

Something else: I don't just think of these things in the terms of the US. Where are these people anywhere in the world? Is there one leader around ANYWHERE who can even hold a candle to him? I mean for crying out loud this fucking SUCKS. Who the hell can we count on?

Fuck it, I'm watching Dodgeball...

BTW, SU Basketball is currently down 15 against Depaul!

F.Y.O.T.W.

2006-03-01T17:07:00.000-05:00

I've decided to institute something new on this blog. It's an award I'm going to start giving out weekly. It's called the F.Y.O.T.W Award and it stands for my Fuck You Of The Week. Every week I will, as Creator of the blog, hand out this award to a person, place, thing, or idea that I feel deserves to be told "Fuck You".

The inaugural F.Y.O.T.W. Award is going to go to Cancer. No, not the Zodiac sign. But the real Cancer. You see, I've had my issues with Cancer for a while now. When I was in sixth grade Cancer showed up and grabbed my maternal Grandma. That was fucked up. I didn't realize it then, but Cancer was talking shit, getting cocky. Next, Cancer showed up and decided he wanted a shot at my paternal Grandfather. Fine, I was 12 the first time around, but I was now a junior in High School. Surely Cancer wouldn't get away with it. Well he did. The fucker. I mean, what could I do? I was just a kid. I'd only had my drivers license for less than a year. Cancer had been around a while and had a whole lot of institutional memory. I was powerless, and I think Cancer saw that. We decided on a truce. I wouldn't talk shit to Cancer and Cancer would leave people I knew alone. But I kind of always knew Cancer planned a sneak attack.

Well, the fucker showed up the other day and ruined a perfectly good meal. Cancer decided to go after my aunt this time. You see, Cancer's a piece of shit. In fact, Cancer is similar to shit in a lot of ways. They both grow inside you quietly. They're both roughly the same color. They both stink...I could go on and on. But I won't. I'll spare you the fecal talk because, well, that's disgusting.

Anyway, back to my aunt. She got diagnosed with Breast cancer. A particularly nasty form too.

You see, here's my problem with Cancer. It doesn't have the balls to just come get you. No, it hides for a while and then appears and you have to deal with it. That's weak.

I swear, if I ever ran into Cancer in a dark alley, I'd pop a cap in it's ass.

If Cancer were my dog, I'd put it to sleep.

If Cancer tried to talk shit to me, I'd stab it in it's throat.

If I were ever to go to prison (highly likely) and Cancer was my cellmate, I'd fashion a shank and shiv Cancer at night when the guards weren't looking...actually, check that...I'd make Cancer my bitch.

But since non of that is actually a possibility right now, I'll just forward link you to this site. It's the Susan G. Komen foundation. They're the ones responsible for the pink ribbons (I think). I'll also link the donations page. It's right here. I'm not going to request you donate or anything because few things make me madder than people asking me to give shit to causes and other things. I'm just showing you the way there because nobody knows. I mean, what if the $20 you donate helps buy the supermicroscope that they need to study something new. Then that discovery leads them to find x, which leads to y, which leads to z, and BOOM it's a cure. You don't know whether or not that's possible.

Also, I'm not saying Breast Cancer is any more important than the other Cancers. Their all equally shitty in my mind. It's that this is the one on my mind right now. If you want to talk about another Cancer, that's cool.

So, won't you all join in me in giving Cancer a big, giant, FUCK YOU!!.
Ready, come on now, real loud: "FUCK YOU CANCER!!!"

I'll take my coffee black:

2006-03-01T12:44:00.000-05:00

I wonder if this is going to be offered in both Hutu and Tutsi flavors:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060301/ap_on_bi_ge/starbucks_rwanda

yeah yeah, I'm an asshole.

What's wrong with me?

2006-02-27T22:38:00.000-05:00

This aggrevates me: http://www.nytimes.com/2006/02/28/nyregion/28detain.html?hp&ex=1141102800&en=7ec5f7a8aa796941&ei=5094&partner=homepage
And not for the reasons you may believe. I understand that all these people had their right violated in some way, and I can empathize with that, but how do they come up with any semblance of "adequate" redress? Where does this person come up with $300k as a reasonable amount of money to provide for the fact that he spent 1 YEAR in jail away from his family, friends, business, etc?
But realistically that's not my real problem with this whole thing either. My real problem is this: Why the hell hasn't anyone violated my civil rights yet? Where's my shot at the pie? I'm an Arab! Don't I too deserve to get sent to jail for one year and be able to get money out of the government? Not only am I an Arab, but I'm also a Sunni Muslim! That's 2 for 2 so far. I should definitely be getting something other than the crap extra security screenings I miraculously win every time I fly. But I can keep going. I work for an organization that works EXCLUSIVELY with the Middle East. Not only that, but I travel to the Middle East for work. Why on Earth have I not been sent to Guantanamo yet? Anyone? Can I please get an answer for this? Believe me, I have enough lawyer friends that I could probably get a cool million for around only 9 months of false imprisonment.
I don't know what aggitates me more; the fact that my tax dollars are paying for the grotesqueness of Guantanamo, or the fact that my tax dollars are paying settlements for people who every time I look at them I feel slightly envious.
Please, Attorney General Gonzales, Mr. Vice President, Mr. President, Karl, someone...if you waterboard me will I not almost drown too? Unleash a German Shephard on me and will I not crap myself? If you torture me, do I not cry?
I DESERVE WHAT EVERYONE ELSE IS GETTING DAMMIT!! I feel left out. It's like there's this whole side to being Arab that I can only experience through leaked Pentagon reports and Al-Jazeera broadcasts.
I know for a fact that most African-Americans have some form of actual discrimination story to tell whenever people start comparing stories. Most Jews have had to deal with either implicit or explicit anti-Semitism, but what about me? Where's my special treatment? Why can't I start being singled out more? Everyone likes to have the attention on them at some point in their lives, and I am no different.

Manifesto

2006-02-24T17:04:00.000-05:00

Here is what this blog will be about.
These are my rules and they're non negotiable.
It's kind of like my little world. Aggrevate me and I can prevent you from commenting or edit your comments to make you seem like you're either racist or anti-semitic . I will control the pace, tenor and direction of all arguments.
If you feel the need to disagree with anything I say, fine. Just know that you are wrong. So why bother? The likelihood of you changing my mind is about the same as the likelihood of me suddenly growing boobs and joining the circus as the bearded lady (so roughly 50-50). Understood?
Good.

I get mad a lot. I don't mean to, it's just that things around me piss me off. In light of that, and in order to prevent spending a fortune in therapy when I'm older, I've decided to vent here. I won't lie, I'm a very angry person.

For example:

I was riding the train last night and I was sitting next to these two girls who would not stop laughing the ENTIRE ride to Baltimore. Seriously, it was absurd. Now, I wasn't sitting in the "Quiet Car" but who the fuck cares? Those two fat bitches should have had the decency to keep their fucking mouths shut. Jesus. Like I really want to sit there and fucking listen to the dumb shit that they have to say?

And they were fucking laughing at some of the dumbest shit. I spent 30 minutes listening to a conversation about a fucking picture on the skinny, fat ones drivers licence. Honestly, why do people really think Drivers License photos are so funny? It's a fucking stupid ID card. Everyone's sucks, the person taking your picture is not some professional photographer, so fucking accept it and move on with your fucking lives and don't fucking sit there cackling while I am trying to read my fucking Clive Cussler novel.

Fucking whores.

That represents the type of post you will see on this blog. I won't lie to you, you may be offended. If you are, and I sincerely hope you will be, then I may appologize. But it depends on what offends you. That's the trick. If you get offended by my language, well fuck off. I don't give a flying fuck about people too uptight to be able to listen to an argument and be turned off by the words used to express that argument.
But, if I make fun of you and you prove to me that I made fun of you on a day that your mother past away (and I mean prove it - I need to see the corpse) well, then I'm sorry.
Seriously, I am.